March 25, 2012

Second Best

Sammi:  "I love you Daddy!"

Me:  "That's sweet.  I love you too pumpkin."

Sammi:  "You're a REALLY good Daddy."

Me:  "Thanks!"

Sammi:  "Did you know that you're the second best Daddy in the whole wide world?"

Me:  "Second best?  That's pretty good, but who's the 'first best' Daddy?"

Sammi:  "All the other Daddies in the world are tied for first. HAHAHAHA!!!"

March 20, 2012


I recently took Sammi and her brothers camping. The camper that we stayed in at the lake had several beds for the kids to choose from, but invariably Sammi would wake me up every night because she was scared and crawl in my bunk and steal all my blankets.

One night I was fast asleep after a long day of hiking and fishing with the kids…

Sammi:  “Daddy!”

Me:  “…”

Sammi:  “DADDY!”

Me:  “Wha – what?”

Sammi:  “Are you awake?”

Me:  “I am now.  What’s wrong?”

Sammi:  “I’m scared.  I heard a noise.”

Me:  “What kind of noise?”

Sammi:  “It sounded like wind, but it might’ve been a bear.”

Me:  “It was probably just the wind Honey, now go back to bed.”

Sammi:  “What if a bear was making wind-noises to trick us?”

Me:  “Bears don’t do that.  It was the wind Samantha.”

Sammi:  “Can I sleep with you anyway?”

Me:  “Okay, but just don’t take all the covers.”

Sammi (climbing in):  “I won’t unless I get cold.”

Me:  “Just go to sleep.  Daddy’s tired.”

Sammi:  “Okay.”

After about 5 minutes I had drifted back to sleep.

Sammi:  “Daddy!”

Me:  “…”

Sammi:  “DADDY!”

Me:  “W-what?!?”

Sammi:  “Are you awake?”

Me (sighing):  “I guess I am.  What do you want?”

Sammi:  “I want you to tell me when you’re asleep so I don’t get scared.”

Me:  “Why would you be scared when I’m asleep?”

Sammi:  “Your breathing sounds like a bear.  I want you to tell me when you’re asleep so I know you’re not a bear.”

Me:  “I can’t tell you when I’m asleep – because I’ll BE ASLEEP!”

Sammi:  “Oh – just tell me when you’re almost asleep then.”

Me:  “Okay – Samantha, I’m almost asleep.  Now close your eyes - please.’

Sammi:  “Okay Daddy.”

After another few minutes, I returned to slumberland…

Sammi:  “Daddy!”

Me:  “…”

Sammi:  “DADDY!”

Me:  “Oh my god!  What is it now Samantha?”

Sammi:  “Are you awake?”

Me:  “Yes.  Unfortunately, I am now awake - again. What is it this time?  Did you hear another bear?”

Sammi:  “You heard it too???”

Me:  “Sweetie, there are no bears around here and even if there were, we are safe in a camper.  Okay?”

Sammi:  “Okay – I guess…”

Me:  “Daddy would never let a stupid old bear hurt you.”

Sammi (seemingly more relaxed):  “Okay Daddy.  Thanks!”

Me:  “You’re welcome, now go to sleep.”

Sammi rolled over taking all the blankets with her and finally went to sleep.

Sammi Camping

March 9, 2012


My kids and I will be on a much needed vacation and 'unplugged' starting tomorrow.
I will return with new posts the week of March 18th. 

March 5, 2012

Crystal Clear

I was getting ready to leave Sammi with her big brother while I went grocery shopping and I was going over what I expected of her while I was gone.

Me:  "Okay.  While I'm at the store you need to clean up your room and then you can watch cartoons until I get back.  Listen to your brother and NO fighting."

Sammi (barely looking up from the TV):  "Sure..."

Me:  "What did I just say?"

Sammi:  "Don't fight and watch cartoons."

Me:  "Not exactly.  Look at me for a second.  Clean up your room first and then you can watch cartoons until I get back. You also need to listen to your brother.  Is that clear?"

Sammi:  "Sure, whatever..."

Me:  "Samantha, am I crystal clear?"

Sammi:  "Nope."

Me:  "What?"

Sammi:  "No - you are definitely NOT crystal clear."

Me:  "What didn't you understand about what I just told you?"

Sammi:  "I understood everything you told me.  You also asked me if you were 'crystal clear' and you're not."

Me:  "What?"

Sammi rolled her eyes at the confused look on my face, took off her glasses and handed them to me.  The lenses were all smudged and dirty.

I sighed at my smart-aleck daughter, cleaned her lenses and then handed the glasses back to her.

Sammi (putting her glasses on and smiling sarcastically):  "Now you are crystal clear Daddy!"

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